Dating Advice | How to Avoid Common Online Messaging Mistakes

So you've checked out her profile and you are about to send her a message. The problem is that you don't know what to say. Don't worry, you aren't the only one with this problem. Here's a piece of dating advice: Don’t overthink it. The sooner you send that first message, the better your chances of connecting with someone.

If this is your first time with online dating, you should know that the dynamic of messaging online is different than having a conversation in person. However, it is the most convenient way to communicate, especially for those who are part of the international dating scene.

The biggest dating advice for men that are new to online messaging is to just be yourself and be natural. However, you still have to be mindful of how you start that first message. To give you a better idea of how to send the right message, learn from these mistakes:

• Talking too much about yourself

  The point of sending a message is to initiate a conversation, not find a soundboard. Craft a message that allows her to share about herself. Not only does this get the ball rolling, but it also shows her you are genuinely interested in her and you aren’t chatting with her for your own self-interests.

• Sending a generic message

  It’s always better to send a customized message than a generic one. In order to craft a specific message, it helps to read her online profile first. If something in her profile sparks your interest, comment on it through your first message. Sending a generic message gives her the impression that you’ve been around the block. Whereas if you customize, she’ll know that she’s special.

• Sending way to many messages at once

  Whether online or in person, the only way a conversation goes well is for both parties to actively participate. So tone down your eagerness when you send that message and actually wait for her to reply. Her response might even surprise you and bring you closer together.

• Asking her out way too late (or not at all)

  Although there’s nothing wrong with taking your time getting to know her, the ultimate goal is still to meet her in person (especially if you’re interacting with an Odessa woman). So you don’t want to get stuck in the messaging phase or you might just end up becoming a penpal instead of a potential love interest.

• Sending a poorly crafted message

  Before you press that send button, make sure you actually put some thought in that first message. Don’t just write anything that automatically comes out of your head. Right before you send, it helps to read what you’d written so far. That way, you’ll know which parts sound off or insensitive. It also helps to proofread your message first. That way you don’t send something that’s grammatically incorrect.

With these basic dating tips, you now have a way to start a conversation with her. But the only way to keep it going is to be yourself. It might take a while to find a woman who responds eagerly, but when you do, at least you’d know she is genuinely interested.